Making Dreams Real - Picture It

Visual tools such as vision boards (their most common name) and collages have been around for a long time. Maybe you've made a few yourself. Some people find them helpful reminders of where they're going, which nudges them into doing what needs to be done in order to get there.

If you're a serial goal-setter or like to juggle a lot of balls at once, you might try using a corkboard and pushpins as a base for temporary idea "collages." I've done this for various short-term things such as planning trips and putting together events. After you've finished the project you can dismantle the collage itself and use the board for your next big gig.

For several years I also created temporary corkboard collages depicting ideas for the upcoming year, right around Winter Solstice. When the year was over I took them apart and reflected on what I'd actually done that year. It served as a reminder that life's events are impermanent and that we're always moving on.

Martha Beck, columnist for O Magazine, wrote an excellent article about vision boards and how they work. WikiHow gives a very basic set of instructions. Most people find that putting images together is so intuitive that they don't need much direction - once they get into the flow, the images almost arrange themselves.

Making Dreams Real: Give Feelings a Supporting (But Not a Starring) Role

One of my most surprising discoveries as I've worked on (and helped others with) various long-term projects is that feelings can sometimes get in the way of moving onward. Whenever I'm not quite in the mood to write it's easy to say to myself "I don't feel like it - maybe another cup of coffee will help motivate me." Three cups later I have caffeine jitters and haven't written a word. A dream should excite you or it's not worthy of your time but that doesn't mean you'll love every tiny task it requires.

My most effective way to deal with "I don't feel like it at the moment" has been to remind myself that I don't need to feel anything in order to get the work done. Sometimes it's just putting one foot in front of the other, even if the journey itself leads to a dearly-held dream. For about 70% of the blocks of time I've set aside for writing and editing projects, I don't feel like doing it when I start. However, it only takes 10-15 minutes of focused work for me to get into the flow.

The next time you feel uninspired, try just sitting down & doing the work anyway. It'll get done even if you don't feel excited about it. You'll be that much closer to achieving whatever it is you're working towards. Give yourself a reward afterward.

Making Dreams Real - The 5-Minute Fix

You don't need enormous swathes of time to do something you've been dying to try. In my experience it's only possible to work steadily on a long-haul project such as writing a novel if you train yourself to accept small amounts and accomplishments. Believing that you have to free up entire 2-hour blocks of time to accomplish anything might scare you into doing nothing at all.

Take a project you're working on and see if you can find ways to fit it into your life as it is, not how you wish it could be. Can you do anything in 5-10 minutes? Fifteen minutes? Half an hour? What about while you're waiting in line, sitting on a bus or driving home from work? If you're a parent who spends 90% of her day running carpools, is there something you can do while you wait for kids?

Try fitting a tiny part of your dream into a corner of your day.

Making Dreams Real: Immediate Changes

One of most useful ideas in Wishcraft could be paraphrased "Get a little of what you want into your life now, as easily and quickly as possible." The author points out that once you get a sampling of your ideal life, work or situation you'll be energized to do more. Your daily routine will get a breath of fresh air. You'll feel like you're going somewhere. From that vantage point, planning for the long term and taking more difficult steps won't seem as onerous.

For example, if you've always wanted to spend a year in Italy, of course you'll need to make a long term plan for getting there. However, you can put a little Italian flavor into your life immediately by signing up for language classes or experiment with cooking. If you're writing a novel, joining a writers' group (even if you don't feel ready to share your work) will put more "writerly" energy in your daily life, not to mention camaraderie and support.

Whatever you're after, start by asking, "What could I do today?" You may be surprised at how far this carries you.

Making Dreams Real: Stop Thinking & Get Moving

My teenage son left home to join Job Corps this week. He'll be learning a trade...and much more. Job Corps participants live on a sort of campus where weekday life is guided by a disciplined regimen: wake-up call at 6:15, breakfast at 6:30, a "P. E." routine outdoors in all weather at 7:30, then work-based learning from 8 to 4. During leisure time participants can use the pool hall/game room, work out in the gym, hike the nearby trails or shoot hoops. There's a TV room but no access to Facebook or online gaming. Kids check email once a day but don't have unlimited computer time.

It's a far different life from the one he left behind. He seems to be enjoying it - he's ready to move into a more adult way of being. I believe that a large part of his mental shift is due to his new physical routine. Its outdoorsy vigor has readied him for mental, emotional and social challenges in a way that positive thinking, affirmations, elaborate visualizations or planning would not have been able to do.

It's been true for me as well. Whenever I've been stuck in a rut, movement is often what gets me unstuck. Sometimes it's been as simple as taking the dog for an additional walk each day. Last week I began jump-starting each workday with a very brisk walk with the dog, followed by 20 minutes of yoga. Since I do this around 6:30-7, I feel like I'm exercising "in spirit" with Noel and his classmates.

I've noticed that during times when I've regularly started the day with a burst of enjoyable physical activity, I tend to keep going at a good (but not manic) pace. I don't "need" as much coffee, and I don't fall into the usual post-lunch slump at work.

If you're frustrated by your lack of progress on your dream project or if you feel pushed around by obligations, try starting your day with half an hour of walking, swimming, biking or whatever stirs you. In addition, work in smaller bursts of movement throughout the day: walk to Starbucks instead of driving the 5 blocks from the office; take the stairs instead of the elevator; take a "roam the hall" break if you have a sedentary job, or a deep-stretch break if you're on your feet all day. Without even thinking about your project, you may find that your head clears and ideas start flowing again.

There are many excellent resources available to help people who want a more active life. One of my favorites is Fit After Forty by Dr. Pamela Peeke. Non-readers might prefer workouts on DVD. Cruise your library or bookstore to find out what's right for you.

Making Dreams Real: What You Don't Want

If you find yourself floundering over what you want to do with your life, it can be helpful to first articulate what you don't want. Often you can translate the "don't want" into "want more of" simply by figuring out its opposite.

For example, a friend of mine realized that she doesn't work well in situations where her work is micromanaged down to the last detail - she needs to know that her boss trusts her to make good decisions. The flip side of "Don't want to be micromanaged" could be "Need a reasonable degree of independence" or "Want boss to trust my judgment."

The "don't want" technique is especially helpful when you're unable to come up with any specific positive requirements or attributes for your goals. It works whether you're looking for a job, a partner, a new house or a group of kindred spirits. Ask yourself why you're dissatisfied with your present situation, or what situations/tasks/people gave you problems in the past. Pinpoint the qualities that caused or are currently causing problems. Then make a new list, based on the opposite qualities, of what you're looking for.

Making Dreams Real

Many years ago, a friend and I facilitated several mutual support groups where participants helped each other define their dreams and create plans for achieving them. We organized the group loosely around the method created by author/coach Barbara Sher, which she describes in her perennial best seller Wishcraft. Back then, she'd given readers permission to use her method in group work as long as we didn't call it "wishcraft," a name reserved for life coaches she personally trained.

Neither my friend (who has since moved back to Texas) nor I are counselors. We don't have certificates and credentials. We were just two ordinary people who were tired of trying to get from Here to There on our own. We knew there must be others who felt the same way, and we suspected that banding together would help all of us.

It's been years since we worked with our groups but almost daily I still meet people who either feel dissatisfied but don't know exactly what they want to achieve, or who know exactly what they want but don't know how to achieve it. Even in a tough economy and cynical national mood, people still have an incredible drive to realize (real-ize: to make real) their dreams.

Over the next posts I'll share some of the resources and tricks we discovered along the way. I hope that in some small way this helps you take steps towards realizing your own dreams this year.