Your Mission, Should You choose to Accept It

During a long drive to an event, a colleague confessed to me that although he'd been working with our group for a number of years, he still didn't feel as though he belonged. All the members were friendly but there seemed to be an impenetrable bond between the founding members that made it hard for newcomers to feel wholly included. His words struck a chord with me; I had been with the group for nearly a decade and still had similar frustrations.

As we discussed possible reasons for this and what we could do about it, I remembered something I had read during the past week. I'd picked up an interesting book from a library shelving cart - Pronoia is the Antidote to Paranoia: How the Universe is Conspiring to Shower You With Blessings by Rob Breszny. The title grabbed me so I took it home.

The book contains thousands of ideas for making mundane life more magical, ranging from the practical to the wild. The activity that intrigued me most was called the Secret Job Title. In this exercise Breszny invites readers to counteract OTJ boredom by choosing a special contribution to make or role to play at work. Our official job titles - Receptionist, Repair Technician, Sales Associate - are cconferred upon us by our employers. Secret job titles, however - Peacemaker, Healer, Comic Relief Expert - are up to us.

Thinking about this, in one of those rare synchronistic moments it all came together for me. In the aforementioned group, in a committee I was chairing and at my son's school, I was noticing how cliquish behavior keeps members of a group from contributing their best work and drives new members away. My own secret job title popped out at me, gift-wrapped, tied with a bow and ready to go: Inclusion Specialist.

Over the course of a year I developed this idea: I wrote a job description, planned specific actions I could take in the various groups to which I belonged, and noted the results. I tried to help new members feel welcome by showing them the ropes and soliciting their input. At times I either attempted to pry open an inner circle or created an alternative circle that outsiders could join.

Having a secret job or mission has not solved all the interpersonal problems I've encountered when working with groups or miraculously zapped boredom completely. However, it has given me a sense of purpose that I can take with me into any activity.

I challenge my readers to choose a secret job for themselves. By doing so, you'll change not only yourself but also your world.